Wisdom
by Bigby
Summary: Upon her return Prentiss is required to 'babysit' a new member of the team. But there's more to him than he lets on.
1. The Babysitter

A/N: Well, it seems as though I've decided to start another story, I'm on intersession from school, so I've got a week off to do some writing and reflect on the things that make the world go round, like reviews and alerts and comments and love for the author of stories that involve Emily and JJ and the team and criminal minds...

* * *

><p>The Babysitter's Club...<p>

Didn't Michael Myers kill babysitters? 

* * *

><p>She had been back all of two months, and despite a few words exchanged in the beginning everything seemed as though it were back to normal.<p>

Or as normal as things could get with the BAU, Emily had been reinstated at full capacity; however Strauss wasn't above the new humanity she had come to find over the last fourteen months.

Emily was to be punished; her punishment had been yet to be decided up until this morning, when she had phoned the agent, at home none the less to tell her to be at the office for eight am sharp.

Now on this bright October morning Emily sat across from Aaron Hotchner in his office with Erin Strauss seated next to her. Emily had her elbows on her knees nervously picking her fingernails chewing on her bottom lip.

She was not happy about this arrangement she would have preferred her recertification training over this going through cadet trainging, anything but this.

Hotch broke the silence first.

"With all due respect ma'am, maybe this isn't a good idea, it's only been eight weeks and agent Prentiss has been reinstated to the field only six of those weeks, and although she has shown exceptional work I'm not doubting that, I just don't believe putting her in charge of a rookie agent would be beneficial for the team right now."

From the look on Strauss' face Hotch could see that he was fighting a losing battle. Strauss had made up her mind...

Hotch gave Emily a sympathetic look and Emily tried to plead her own case.

"Ma'am agent Hotchner is right and considering my recent judgement history do you really think that this is a good idea"

Chief Strauss narrowed her eyes further, she did in fact think this was a good idea, the fellow agent she had in mind would be the perfect fit and maybe she could use this as leverage, after all agent Prentiss and the rest of the BAU for that matter were under the microscope now,

They had to do what they were told, with as little to no resistance as they could muster...Strauss had them and Hotch and Prentiss were beginning to see that.

"Yes, Agent Prentiss I do, because I don't think you're stupid enough to make the same mistakes twice in one year and maybe having something to be accountable for will help you with your transition back"

This woman was such a cretin.

Emily left Hotch's office in order for the two to discuss the terms of this 'mentoring arrangement' that was what Strauss had called it.

Emily sat at her desk to pout she looked up as she saw Morgan approach,

"That good huh?"

Prentiss nodded, "Oh yeah"

She took the offered cup of coffee and Morgan sat across from her,

"So what did good old Straus have to say?"

"I'm being put into a mentoring arrangement program, it's pretty much a pretty term for a babysitter...to some new kid that has been transferred into the BAU. Can you believe that?"

Morgan shook his head and gave Emily a sympathetic smile, their job was difficult there was no denying that, but Emily had taken on a protégé before and although she enjoyed it she didn't feel like she could handle it right now.

Morgan stood and headed to his office,

"Don't worry Prentiss; you'll be just fine you both will"

Emily watched as Chief Strauss exited the bullpen in a flurry of expensive perfume and hurried footsteps, she had other lives to disrupt after all. She turned on her heel as she approached the double doors and addressed Emily in that condescending way that only she could muster and said,

"You meet your protégé tomorrow at 8, don't be late"

And that was it. 

* * *

><p>AN: I know it isn't much so far, and I know what you may all be thinking...however the review button is just over there...so the more reviews and love I get the faster I type the second chapter...pronto?


	2. Ten Paces Apart

A/N: okay I forgot the disclaimer in the last story, so here it is, I don't own CM, that's all Mark Gordon and CBS... Well it looks like in this chapter we meet my brain child, treat him well, he means a lot to me...

* * *

><p>She was Here All Along...<p>

I just wasn't looking very hard...

"_I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him" –Mark Twain  
><em>

* * *

><p>The young man tipped his head back and closed his eyes, inhaling deeply the scent of fresh rain fall.<p>

He took a hearty sip from his bottle of bourbon and savoured the way it settled in his stomach, he wasn't sure if he was supposed to count himself lucky or screwed...

She owned him now.

"_Mr. Gainnes, I suggest you get down on your knees and thank whatever righteous deity is on your side that you're even getting these back"_

_Donovan Gainnes wasn't the praying type, _

"_Ma'am, with all due respect, you can't really tell me you thought I wasn't coming back...how's your son?"_

_Strauss had glared at him something fierce, he simply smirked at her over his glasses took his gun and turned to leave her office._

"_Your, team will be returning from Idaho tonight Donovan, you can meet them tomorrow morning"_

_Strauss spoke to the retreating man's back, he just kept walking, he knew where they were, and he knew about the case..._

Donovan let out a deep sigh; he took another healthy sip from his bottle emptying it and tossed it over the fire escape.

He ducked inside and made his way to where he had his home office, living in a loft affording him the luxury of having a large vantage point of his home, no walls, meant that there was no place for a potential threat to hide.

He sat at his desk and flipped through the files Strauss had 'asked' him to go through; Donovan spent the rest of the night reviewing the cases the team had covered in his absence.

* * *

><p>Donovan was awake before his alarm, he was a meticulous man that craved a daily personal routine, no matter where he was in the country, he was up by 5:15, he would work out until 5:45 and be on his way to work by 6:30 am, no excuses no exceptions.<p>

And this morning was no different 7:15 had the newly reinstated, SSA Donovan Gainnes walking into the bullpen of the BAU for the first time in nearly eight years.

And my had things changed, the bullpen seemed bigger to him than it had then; he noticed certain names were gone and others he didn't recognize.

He noticed Spencer Reid's desk had not moved; Donovan looked over to where his unit chief's office still remained.

It was good to see that some things never changed.

Donovan made his way to Aaron Hotchner's office, not bothering to knock he dumped his reinstatement papers on to his desk with a broad smile.

Hotch looked up; ready to rip in to whoever dared disturb him but stopped short when he saw who it was.

"Donovan?"

The man could freeze fire with his looks,

Donovan smirked and sat down in front of his new boss, or was that old boss...new old boss?

"You're the agent being assigned to Prentiss, but you're not a rookie?"

"Astute observation there tips"

Hotch glared and Donovan had the sense to look a little bit sheepish.

"She reinstated you?"

"I'm as shocked as you are, she didn't want to, the director didn't give her a choice this time, "

Hotch cocked his head to the side in question,

"With the recent reshuffling of departments at the Bureau and the BAU being torn apart over the last little while the director panicked, and told Strauss I was to be found immediately."

"But that doesn't explain Prentiss, "

Donovan shrugged his shoulders,

"Maybe Strauss thinks we'll teach each other something"

Hotch signed Donovan's reinstatement papers and filed them away, returning to his file folder he dismissed Donovan without words.

Donovan left the office and went to sit at Reid's desk, the two young men had become fast friends his first time at the BAU.

He was glad he would know at least one person on the team.

Hotch looked out his office window and took in the man he saw.

Donovan stood at 6'3 easily 175lbs and was not the type of man you got angry. Aaron had met him while he was in the academy. He was fit smart and easily the best profiler Hotch had ever met.

Gideon and Rossi not withstanding

When Hotch had taken over the BAU he was asked to build his own primary team from scratch and immediately he thought of Donovan Reid soon followed and then JJ Elle and Gideon who came out of retirement to round out their ragtag family.

Hotch liked to think of Donovan as the anti-Reid. The boy had been studying psychology and behavioural science since he could read, could be considered a certifiable genius, but unlike Reid he lacked the innocence and naivety that kept Reid the quiet soft spoken man he was.

Reid buried himself in books and statistics because those were the things that made sense to him.

Donovan used his genius as a survival tactic and never truly learned to trust those around him.

And once upon a time there was a time that Aaron Hotchner and Erin Strauss agreed and on Donovan Gainnes they did agree.

_Aaron Hotchner stood in front of the desk of his section Chief, as she read over his recommendation for the primary tactical team of the Behavioural Analysis Unit"_

"_You've picked a good team Aaron; I wish you all the best, but a suggestion if I may?"_

_Hotch gave her a slight nod to continue,_

"_Keep an eye on Gainnes; he's brilliant but, reckless"_

_Hotch gave him another nod and left the room he had phone calls to make._

Donovan remembered where he was the day he got that visit from Hotch, he remembered opening the door to his apartment and laughing at the dark charcoal suit and professional hair cut.

"_You look like a Jehovah's witness"_

"_Do you know who I am?"_

"_From the way you favour your left leg you've got a secondary weapon around your ankle, you didn't' bring your service weapon because you read my file and you figured that if you wore your service weapon I would think I was in trouble and run, you're right I would have...no you're here to offer me a job..."_

_Hotch had been right, the kid was good.  
><em>

* * *

><p>"Uh, excuse me, but can I help you?"<p>

In the present Donovan opened his eyes to find Derek Morgan standing over him,

"I don't know, can you?"

'_Who the hell was this clown?'_

Morgan was going to kick this kid,

"Depends, why are you sitting in someone's desk?"

I'm sitting on his chair not in his desk,"

"Donovan?"

Reid walked up behind Derek and put his stuff on his desk as Donovan stood to greet his old friend.

"Reid hey, it's good to see you"

The men hugged and Derek continued to look confused.

"Oh, Morgan this is Donovan, Gainnes, he used to be a member of the BAU, Donovan this is Derek Morgan"

The two men shook hands; Derek had to tilt his chin up to meet Donovan's eyes.

"Derek you actually replaced Donovan"

Derek looked really confused now, this guy didn't look any older than 30

Donovan smiled,

"I'm 33 I wasn't with the BAU for very long four years, I was recruited out of the academy, you don't believe me ask Hotch"

Derek could do nothing but stand there amazed at this kid; he looked like a rugby player not a profiler.

"So do you"

Donovan said and gave Derek a smile full of teeth. Derek just shook his head and walked to his office, this was just too strange.

Derek too took the vantage point his office gave him and watched the two young men interact. They like polar opposites, Spencer Reid was tall wiry and loved his sweater vests. Donovan stood at least 3 inches taller than Reid, broad shoulders and lean athletic build; he could have easily been the type of guy that bullied a kid like Reid.

But Morgan saw a quiet respect between the two, they were both severely misunderstood for their genius and it affected them both.

Derek saw Emily walk into the bullpen, scowl firmly in place going through something on her phone,

She ignored both Donovan and Reid and headed straight to Hotch's office.

"You wanted to see me sir?"

"Prentiss come in close the door and take a seat"

She did as she was told, something in her made the hairs on the back of her neck stand up,

"You're assignment from Strauss is here, "

Emily rolled her eyes,

"I know you're less than accepting of the situation, but you need to know something before you meet him..."

There was a knock on the door and Hotch closed his eyes in frustration,

"Come in"

JJ poked her head in and faltered for a moment at the heavy air in the room,

"Uh, Garcia's got a case"

Hotch pursed his lips,

"We'll be right there"

JJ nodded and left the office, Hotch returned his attention back to Emily,

"His name is Donovan Gainnes, here"

Hotch handed her his FBI file it had to be nearly a quarter of an inch thick,

"I'm sure he's already read yours"

He stood and Emily followed as they headed into the round table room.

Introductions and reintroductions were made.

Garcia let out a squeal and immediately wrapped Donovan in a hug when she saw him.

"You mister Gainnes have been gone far too long! I thought you had moved to Fiji?"

Donovan smiled,

"No, I bought a plane ticket to Fiji...stayed in DC"

Emily and Gainnes exchanged handshakes and names and then the team got to work.

Donovan sat on the jet with his eyes closed; he felt the air around him shift as someone sat in front of him.

It was Emily; he opened his eyes and raised his eyebrows expectantly. He saw the guilt flicker across her eyes and smirked,

"Don't feel bad for reading my file, I read yours, so, you went rogue huh, impressive"

"I nearly got myself killed"

Donovan levelled Prentiss with a look,

"I guess we know why Strauss stuck us together, don't worry I wouldn't dream of replacing your partner, you trust him, and you don't know if you want to trust me yet."

"Can I ask you something?"

Donovan nodded,

"Why the BAU?"

Donovan thought about it and gave what would be his most honest answer to this question,

"I wanted to know why people did the things they did and if there really was a way to prevent their behaviour instead of just anticipating it"

The case in St. Louis was taking its toll on the team;

By the time their first night on the case rolled around, Bobby's mother Mrs. Smith had been found dead with massive amounts of overkill, this guy was angry.

Donovan had taken a walk when they got to the hotel late that night, he ran into JJ on his way back in and couldn't help but over hear her conversation.

"Hey mom, no everything is fine, I just wanted to call and say I love you"

JJ ended her phone call and turned to see Donovan approaching her,

"Hey, how are you doing?"

"Like riding a bike, never really forget how to turn it off, what about you?"

JJ shook her head and smiled unable to really form an answer,

"You want to be angry at Mrs. Smith; you can't understand how the woman can't see that she has so much to live for, but it's your compassion for others that stops you, from expressing the fact that if she weren't a victim, you would hate her"

JJ looked at Donovan anger and shock across her face,

"You know it's a team rule that we aren't allowed to profile each other."

Donovan shook his head and laughed,

"Do you really think this team would function as well as it does if you didn't profile each other?"

Donovan cleared his throat and lit a cigarette as JJ looked at him expectantly; he sighed and rolled his eyes blowing smoke out his nose.

"Hotch, profile's this team more than he profiles unsubs, and he does it to make sure everyone is where they need to be. "

The two had made it to the hotel bar and were sitting at a table in the corner so they could finish their discussion. Donovan nodded at his waitress as she placed his bourbon in front of him and left.

And then he continued,

"You made the promise not to profile each other out of respect for privacy, and I get that, but don't sit there and tell me you don't profile each other quietly to yourselves. "

Donovan finished his drink and made a movement to stand, but not before giving JJ a bit of advice,

"People who run, aren't always cowards, sometimes it's necessary, and no matter how okay you think you are with the whole situation, you still feel like you're not good enough"

And with that Donovan left JJ at her seat to ponder what just happened, and she was very confused.

The team had made it home from St. Louis without any more casualties, Donovan found himself in Hotch's office,

"You're first case back, how did it feel?"

"Like I never left, Hotch, I never wanted to leave you need to understand that"

"But you had to I know that, you and Prentiss have a lot in common Donovan, it would be good if you talked to her, you can't keep going though this alone,"

"I know, but I just don't"

"Trust her? You're going to have to trust someone Donovan, have you spoken to anyone about your time away, at all?"

"I'm talking to you right now aren't I? I'm sorry, to hear about Haley, I wanted to be there, but I was overseas"

Hotch nodded,

'It's okay, you should drop by for dinner on Sunday the team will be there, in the meantime, enjoy your weekend"

Donovan took this as a dismissal and left the office he sat at his desk across from Reid and stared at the man until he looked up,

"You know staring is impolite,"

Reid smiled at Donovan, who smiled back, but it didn't quite reach his eyes.

"You miss her don't you?"

It wasn't really a question, and Donovan knew this,

"Of course"

* * *

><p>AN: I'm not defending CBS when I say this but... even though we nearly lost them, it seems like this whole shit storm that we found our favourite two girls from the show in over the past couple seasons has really had a positive impact. People are dedicated and fanfic writers have found new meaning in their favourite pairings and not just for Prentiss and JJ, okay that's my soapbox. R&R if you know what's good for ya...tell me what you think of Mr. Gainnes.


	3. The Magic Word

A/N: Some o the military stuff and timeline stuff I tried to make as accurate as possible it aint perfect, but this is fiction after all and can I just request, that you give our Donovan a chance? He is the way he is for a reason, not because he woke up one morning and decided to be an ass...anyways, hands and feet out side o the vehicle at all times and you should do just fine...and remember review make my world go round'!

* * *

><p>Family, I have one now...<p>

But for how long...?

In some families, _please _is described as the magic word. In our house, however, it was _sorry._

-Margaret Lawrence.

* * *

><p><em>His feet were cold, his feet were always cold. He tried to curl in under the blanket but he had out grown it months ago.<em>

_He slowly went over his mental checklist for the night, made sure mom ate, made sure mom put out the cigarette she fell asleep with in her mouth, turn off the television, lock the door._

_The banging started not soon after he had fallen asleep, they were quiet at first, and then they got louder and louder, until someone had kicked his bedroom door open._

'_What now? I remembered to do everything, didn't I?'_

_Did it matter?_

_Donovan prayed the banging wouldn't wake his mother..._

"_Don't pretend to sleep kid, I know you're awake"_

_He felt strong hands grab at his hair and yank him out of bed...  
><em>

* * *

><p>Donovan bolted up right in bed; he looked over at his alarm clock it read 4:30.<p>

He shook his head of the last remnants of sleep and decided to get ready for the day,

It had been about a month since his return to the team and his babysitter had decided that they would train together everyday.

She had told him it was to get back into shape, or to keep _in_ shape in his instance, he knew that it was really so she could assess how he moved and to get into his brain, he let her do it though.

Hotch was right he may not like the situation, but he had to make the best of it.

So, Emily Prentiss picked him up every morning at 6:45, the woman was never late and never early. She would give the lit cigarette in his hand a hard look before he tossed it aside and got in.

"Nice beard"

Emily usually ribbed him for his facial hair, last week he had mutton chops, this week he seemed to just not have bothered to shave for a couple days.

Usually their ride in was companionable sometimes they would just listen to the radio or the news or traffic and sometimes they would chat, Donovan seemed different this morning though.

His eyes darted around more; the vein in his temple strained against his skin and his jaw was clenched.

Emily reached over and placed a gentle hand to his forearm, they had become decent friends in the recent weeks,

Emily started to feel like less of a mentor and more of a babysitter, seriously this guy was worse than Morgan with his hero antics.

Morgan didn't seem to mind, he was becoming fond of the guy too, Derek may be Emily's partner but Donovan was a guy's guy and Morgan made him feel right at home

Eventually...

"Hey are you alright?"

He swallowed thickly and turned his head to look at her,

"Yeah, I think I'm fighting a cold"

He gave her a genuine smile and she returned it in kind,

"Ok, you just seem a little different"

They continued in silence for a few minutes, both were frantically trying to assess the other.

They arrived to the Bureau training facility and set about their routine, making small talk and keeping each other relatively entertained while sparring

Emily decided that Donovan wasn't a bad guy, he just had a lot of baggage, and that he needed all the support he could stand, she made a mental note to talk to Garcia about him.

Donovan seemed distracted and this became even more apparent when he took a hard right hook from Emily to the eye and crumpled to the ground.

"Oh my God, are you okay!"

He shook his head, and swayed as he tried to stand,

"Yeah, you caught me by surprise that's all, don't worry about it"

He offered her a rare smile, one that seemed genuine and they finished up for the morning.

"So it's a Saturday, did you want to grab some lunch?"

"Actually I've got plans, but it's my turn to host Sunday dinner, you know team building and all that"

Emily dropped him off at home and made a quick call to Garcia, she was the only other person aside from Reid and Hotch that could find out anything about him,

It wasn't really an invasion of privacy was it? She had read his file, and he seemed okay with it, she just wanted to make sure he was alright...

Right?

"Hey PG its Emily, are you busy?"

"On the contrary my lovely, Morgan told me you might call, want to tell me what's going on?"

Morgan and Emily had tried several times to hang out with the younger man; however he always had a well placed excuse at the ready.

Truthfully, the only person Donovan really hung out with outside of the BAU and cases was Reid, of course there was Sunday dinner, and Donovan showed up to every single one, but they still couldn't shake the feeling that Donovan was hiding something...

"It will have to wait until I get there"

"No problemo see you soon PG out"

And with that Emily made her way over to Garcia's apartment.

* * *

><p>Spencer sat in an out of the way corner that gave him the perfect vantage point to see both entrances of the coffee shop.<p>

He stood and gave a small wave to his friend, Donovan walked over and gave him a smile and sat in front of him.

"I took the liberty of ordering for you, I hope you don't mind"

Donovan shook his head and took an appreciative sip from his coffee

"No problem Spence, I can still call you Spence right; I mean JJ calls you Spence but..."

Donovan tore away at the lip of his takeout coffee cup, this guy had been his best friend, and small talk over coffee was like pulling teeth.

"It's fine Donovan really, so what was so important?"

Donovan started to fiddle with his hands, he just felt so damn guilty about everything, he hadn't been given a choice and if he had, if he had known then what he knew now...no

He helped save lives...

He sighed and made eye contact with Reid,

"How are things with you, really?"

He was avoiding the real reason he had called Reid out,

Reid sighed and gave Donovan a slight reprieve from whatever it was he had asked him out to coffee.

"Are you asking whether or not I've been working the program?"

Donovan smirked and ran his hands through his hair,

"Yeah that's my way of asking if you've been working the program Spence"

Donovan smiled and took a small sip of his coffee, he needed a cigarette,

"I have been actually, doing quite well too, thanks for asking...so Donovan, do you want to tell me honestly why you called me today...considering I would have seen you tomorrow?"

Donovan took a deep breath and levelled Spencer with a serious look,

"My night mares are coming back...at first it was just my parents, you know the one, and then I started seeing Cassandra Spence..."

Reid nodded in understanding and gave Donovan a sympathetic look,

"Have you told anyone else?"

"I think Hotch knows, but I can never be too sure with that guy."

Donovan played with the lip of his coffee mug and continued,

"Spence, I'm sorry about everything, I tried to stay in touch at first but things got,"

He didn't know what to say, what could he say?

"Difficult"

Reid finished for him, Donovan nodded sadly, and he wondered how his life had gotten so fucking weird...

"And the next thing I knew I was being shipped overseas. And then there was Cassandra..."

Spence smiled at his old friend, Donovan would have been good to have around when Gideon had left.

Where had he been?

"Where were you, when Gideon had left?"

Donovan had made it a point, that even if he couldn't be there for his friends he at least tried to stay on top of everything that was going on with them, he had heard about the case with the college girls in Arizona which had caused Gideon's resignation from the Bureau, he had asked to come home after that, his request had been denied.

Donovan looked up from his cup,

"North Korea"

* * *

><p>Emily sat next to Garcia as she typed furiously on her laptop trying to dig into the personal life of Donovan Gainnes,<p>

"It says here that he was born in Brooklyn New York, to a Mary Dunne and Donovan Gainnes their only son. Dad was a drunk and mom wasn't any better poor kid, did you know he's nearly as smart as Reid? He gained reprieve from his torrid home life by attending a military high school, joined the marines at seventeen, loaned to Interpol from the BAU in 2002 and was put on an international profiling and interrogation task force."

Garcia's fingers floated over the keyboard once more,

"Looks like he was good at his job too, hey look he was with Interpol the same time as you, are you sure you never saw him? You guys were sort of in the same department"

Emily shook her head,

"Most of the missions I was on were undercover, deep cover. Donovan was never cleared for undercover work see? He handled the agents that went undercover, he monitored their behaviour made sure they didn't end up with Stockholm syndrome, remembered who they really were stuff like that..."

Garcia typed a few more keys and pulled up a few more files,

"He went from being on loan to Interpol to working for them full time until 2009 when he returned to the USMC. Oh look a photo of him with his unit, so that's what's hiding under those graphic tees."

Garcia gave a little growl and Emily snickered,

"He stayed with the USMC while being a behavioural consultant to the EU. Seems like our Donovan Gainnes was a busy little boy, Oh look, it says here that he was married..."

When she had arrived to Garcia's apartment, she only wanted to know what Donovan's deal was she read his file and knew his full service history his tenure with the BAU that sort of thing.

He had wanted to be a career marine, his goals and achievements were geared towards that but after being recruited to the BAU he had put it on hold.

"He was given an honourable discharge from the marines last year after his wife was murdered, he had been away; she was six months pregnant..."

The two women looked at the screen taking in what they had learned about the recent addition to their team; Emily knew the guy had baggage but this...

And then an encrypted file that was sat right in the middle of his service with the BAU caught Emily off guard, so she had Garcia open it.

She wasn't quite sure she knew what she was looking at.

Special Request of Services

Date Issued: November 10th 2002

Name: Gainnes, Donovan Henry

Date of Birth: January 10th 1978

Age: 24

Unit: Behavioural Analysis

The following is a formal Request of Service for the above mentioned.

Location: Unknown

Duties: Handler of Primary Subject A

Duration: unknown

Handler: Sean McAllister

"Oh my God"

Emily muttered; he had been her handler...

For a split second Emily thought it was another Sean McAllister, but she knew better, the dates were too close together,

"That's not what that says"

Garcia whispered in disbelief.

Emily could do nothing but blink at the screen.

As she started to put two and two together,

The death of Donovan's wife coincided with the timeline of Doyle's resurgence into the US the previous year...

Donovan having been away from the BAU for as long as he was,

Hotch and Strauss pushing for the two of them to work together...

* * *

><p><em>Sean McAllister sat across from a very tired Emily Prentiss; she had been put through the ringer by the Italian Secret Service and just about every other European agency that was on the case.<em>

_She just wanted a long hot bath and to make sure Declan stayed out of harm's way._

"_What's going on Sean, don't you think it would have been a good idea to tell me about the raid?"_

"_He knew, Emily, Doyle knew we were coming, he knew who you were we had to move quickly"_

"_Who I __**am**__ Sean, Doyle didn't know who I __**was**__ he knows who I __**am**__..."_

_She had been Lauren Reynolds for the last three years; right now she wanted to be Emily Elizabeth Prentiss..._

_Sean smirked, they may have never met, but Donovan had done one hell of a job keeping Emily grounded._

_Emily rolled her tired eyes and put her head down on the table to rest over her arms._

"_Where are they taking him?"_

"_Russia"_

"_What are they going to do with him?"_

"_They've assembled an interrogation task force to deal with him, break him, Emily I promise he won't be able to hurt you."  
><em>

* * *

><p>Emily stood from her seat beside Garcia<p>

"I have to go"

Emily didn't wait for a response; she just fled from the apartment, jumped in her car and sped off.

She pulled up to the driveway of a ranch style home, and barely gave herself time to shut off the ignition before she jumped out of the car and marched up to the front door of the house.

Knocking frantically Emily was two seconds away from kicking the door in when it opened up to reveal startled blue eyes and an annoyed frown,

"Em, what the..."

Emily pushed passed JJ and grabbed her by the arm pulling her into the house alongside her,

"Did you know about Donovan?"

* * *

><p>AN: So we learned a little more about Donovan, and Donovan's learning how to be less of an ass...R&R please, it would be much appreciated!


	4. Forgive Us Our Trespasses

A/N: JJ comes clean to Emily, and Donovan reveals his past to his babysitter, because she doesn't really give him a choice...arms and legs outside o the vehicle at all times and we should be just fine. Reviews make my world go round so please be kind and hit that lil button o'er there.

* * *

><p>Forgive me Lord for the sins I have committed...<p>

And the sins I have yet to commit...

_Other men's sins are before our eyes; our own are behind our backs-Seneca  
><em>

* * *

><p>JJ couldn't look at her, of course she knew. She had been debriefed thoroughly on Doyle when she had been requested to work the case with the BAU last year.<p>

She knew all about Donovan Gainnes, how he was tasked with Emily's surveillance making sure she was doing her job, that she was never compromised.

He had picked her for the job after all.

Clyde had disagreed he didn't want her involved it was too dangerous this time. Clyde had been too close; he couldn't think objectively anymore Donovan had been the objective one.

She was his type, matched him intellectually, and she was a damn convincing bad guy

After the first two years of nothing but silence from Doyle while he was in custody the North Koreans realized the man wasn't going to talk.

So they enlisted the help of Interpol once more and set about getting into this man's head. They couldn't break him physically, but maybe, with a little coercion they could break him mentally.

So Sean McAllister asked him what he thought they should do.

Donovan had been the one tasked to watch Emily with Doyle, to make sure she stayed on task, three years was a long time to be undercover, to absorb an identity and it was dangerous.

He advised Sean that the only other thing that Ian Doyle loved other than Lauren Reynolds was his son.

If Doyle had been surprised when Donovan walked into his cell that day and not some North Korean militant he didn't show it.

* * *

><p>"<em>Nach bhfuil tu ag dul chun labhairt tat u ag lan, an fiedir liom a ghlaonn tu Ian?" (You're not going to talk are you Ian, can I call you Ian?)<em>

_Donovan was met with silence. He would be at it for another two days and all Donovan would get out of the man was the Lord's Prayer in Gaelic._

_He understood the North Korean's frustration they were running out of ideas when they had called him in._

_So Donovan had tasked Sean with telling Emily what she had to do..._

_And now Donovan had something the North Korean's didn't,_

"_Inis dom faoi do mhac" (tell me about your son)_

_Doyle became silent and raised his head,_

"_Ni feidir liom bhfuil mac" (I don't have a son)_

_Donovan levelled Doyle with a hard stare and dropped the 6x4 photograph under Doyle's nose._

_Donovan hated seeing grown men cry._

_Doyle tried to lash out but he was restrained _

"_Cad e seo? Mei data deanta gat?" (What is this? What have you done?)_

"_Is e an chogaidh seo" (This is war)_

_Donovan left the man to his wailing, even though he knew it wasn't real, a part of him felt sick.  
><em>

* * *

><p>Emily had JJ pressed up against her front door, if this were any other situation JJ would have been thrilled, but now was clearly not the time to divulge in her inner feelings for her colleague.<p>

"Yes, I knew...we...the State Department had been under the impression that you would never meet Donovan, you had no reason to."

JJ felt Emily's grip tighten slightly at the admission. JJ just wanted to take Emily into her arms and make it better, but she knew this really didn't have anything to do with her.

This was between Emily and Donovan so she cleared her throat and continued her confession,

"But then Doyle broke out of prison and went on a vengeance spree and you went AWOL. Honestly we were shocked you didn't go looking for Gainnes or that he didn't go looking for you"

Emily had always thought that it was Clyde watching her back...

Why hadn't Donovan come looking for her when Doyle escaped?

Emily shook her head and JJ gave Emily a weary smile,

"You should sit down"

Emily stepped out of JJ's personal space, and if she had to be honest she could almost hear a sigh of regret from the smaller woman.

She followed JJ to the kitchen and took a seat on a bar stool at the island and watched the blonde intensely as she puttered around making coffee for the two of them.

With her back turned towards Emily and her dark stare it gave JJ the opportunity to collect her thoughts, she really thought that Donovan should be here, and she expressed this thought to Emily,

"Donovan should be here Em; he can probably tell you more than I can"

Emily gave JJ a curt nod and JJ made the call,

Donovan hated the urgency in JJ's tone; he was trained to take urgency as one of two things panic, or impatience and sometimes both.

He made it to JJ's in less than twenty minutes; he cracked his knuckles as he waited for JJ to answer the door.

She had a panicked almost wild look about her when the door swung open; his eyes darted around the room assessing any threats.

"Hey Jayje, everything okay?"

"Donovan, hey come in"

JJ gave him a slight hug and as he was lead to the kitchen, he caught Emily's glare as he entered behind JJ; there was no mistaking that look, Emily knew...

JJ didn't have time to register what was happening it all happened in a blur,

Donovan was on the ground Emily on top of him with her fingers wrapped around his throat.

He barely had enough time to shrug off his leather jacket, it was bunched down around his elbows as he tried to fight off Emily, her rage and element of surprise had given her an advantage.

"You son of a bitch, you left me there! I asked to be extracted and you just fucking left me there!"

Donovan struggled until Emily kneed him in the stomach, she had his hands pinned to the floor and he couldn't move just in case Emily kneed him again.

JJ didn't really know what to do; she couldn't separate them for fear of hurting one or both of them,

"I had to leave you there; don't you think I wanted to bring you in? As soon as we found out about Declan I told them to extract you, fucking Clyde wanted to keep you in six more months, six more months to make sure their case was solid, they had him in Northern Ireland, Emily I swear to God I never wanted to leave you there!"

The young man sounded broken, he had lost just as much as anybody because of Doyle, for a moment Emily thought she saw tears in his eyes.

Northern Ireland?

That had been six months before she found out that Declan was Doyle's son,

She had been under for nearly two years by then,

Emily kneed him in the groin and stood up, taking her place at the island once more.

Donovan rolled around on the ground groaning in pain,

JJ's eyes just flitted from one agent to the other; maybe she should have taken their service weapons before suggesting this.

JJ helped Donovan up and over to the couch as Emily sat with her back to him at the island.

"So you knew that I would get attached to his son?"

Donovan sighed,

"Yes I knew, I read your files, I had your medical history, and that kind of personal trauma always manifested into the needs you expressed."

Donovan raked his hands through is hair, and sighed.

"There was no threat to you or the boy while we were under the impression he was Louise's"

He had read her psych evaluations upon joining Interpol. He knew all about her, well at least she didn't feel so bad for digging through his life now.

Emily looked at JJ who was standing on the other side of the island she nodded towards Donovan gesturing to Emily that she should go and sit with him,

Emily trusted very few people in this world, she trusted her team with her life, and that included Donovan, she may have been angry, he had lied by omission, then again so had she.

Hotch was right they did have a lot in common, maybe more than he let on.

She did as JJ suggested and sat across from him.

JJ went to her office upstairs to give them some privacy, she was almost certain they wouldn't try and kill each other, her home was Geneva if they knew what was good for them.

Emily took a deep breath in affording her the opportunity to physically take in the man before her.

He looked nothing of the confident, charismatic agent she worked with in the field. All this man radiated now was guilt and loss...

"How long, were you with the task force?"

"From the beginning, I picked you, Sean, Clyde and I profiled I and his known female associates and I came up with you."

Donovan was sort of proud of this fact, Emily had been his first assignment, and he had done a damn good job, had the acclamations from the Brass to prove it...

He just wished it hadn't come at such high a cost.

"Clyde was dead set against it; he kept bringing up Prague saying you weren't ready."

Donovan smirked as he kept rubbing his hands, a nervous habit she had noticed about him,

"Prague was Clyde's fault by the way." Donovan deadpanned.

Emily took this all in. It was unnerving to a point that this man, who was a good ten years younger than her, knew almost all there was about her. He had followed her every move for the entire duration of the mission.

She levelled him with a serious look,

"I want you to tell me everything from the beginning Donovan"

* * *

><p>AN:I know it's a cliff-hanger and I'm sorry, I'm really only doing this so I can get a realistic representation of who actually reads these things, then again, if only one person reads it then I'll be happy...and if more than one person reads this...well leave me a comment so I know! Donovan's revelation will be up after the weekend, and then I'll get into what's going on with Cheeto Breath and Emily :D


	5. Forgive Those Who Trespass Against Us

A/N: I just want to thank all of you guys who review and write comments it helps a lot...and to all you lurkers out there...what are you waiting for write something, anything! Time to learn what really happened in Europe with Doyle, Emily and the rest o those crazy people...and we meet Donovan's wife...there's a mention of her at least...arms and legs outside of the vehicle at all times and reviews as always reviews and comments make my world go round... 

* * *

><p>The truth will set you free...<p>

Funny this truth resembles bars...

_The truth is rarely pure and never simple—Oscar Wilde_

* * *

><p>Donovan took a deep breath in and closed his eyes...the beginning?<p>

Okay...

_November 10__th__ 2002..._

_Donovan was sitting across from Reid his feet on his desk reading a text on cognitive science. He felt the air change around him and turned his head slightly to the left as he heard the approaching footsteps, heavy gait, and wide strides slight squeak._

_Military._

_The clean cut military man approached Donovan's desk. He removed his feet from his desk promptly and stood at attention, old habits he supposed._

_Hotch walked out of his office his knuckles turning white as they wrapped around the railing that surrounded the cat walk in the BAU bullpen,_

_He had hoped he could talk to Donovan about this before they came for him, he had hoped wrong._

_Hotch took a deep breath in and let it out slowly as he watched the interaction between his young agent and the polished soldier,_

"_Supervisory Special Agent Donovan Gainnes?"_

"_Sir?"_

"_Would you follow me agent?"_

_He followed the man to Hotch's office,_

"_Hotch? What's going on?"_

_The officer stood until he was offered a seat by Hotch; Donovan did the same._

"_Donovan, I'm sorry, but there's been a request for your transfer, I tried to stop it, but as you can see"_

_Donovan looked at the man to his left, dressed in his military service uniform, Donovan immediately thought he was being deployed to Iraq, his wife was going to shoot him,_

"_Where am I going?"_

_Hotch shook his head,_

"_I don't know, and I can't know"_

"_Do I have a say in this?"_

_Donovan looked from the military officer to his boss, and the answer was clearly written on both men's faces, he was going, even if they had to drag him kicking and screaming out of the BAU he was going._

_The military man spoke; he never did catch his name,_

"_SSA Gainnes, I have been requested by the department of defence to have you packed and ready for deployment to your new post by 0600 tomorrow, any insubordination will be dealt with as a direct dereliction of duty and you will be heralded a defector understood?"_

_Well, fuck that put that straight..._

_Donovan could do nothing but nod, _

"_I will wait for you down stairs SSA Gainnes, SSA Hotchner thank you for your time"_

_The military man left, leaving a stunned Donovan and a scowling Hotch,_

"_You couldn't have warned me Hotch?"_

_Donovan was yelling, Hotch was glad the military officer had closed his door on the way out,_

_Donovan was agitated pacing and scrubbing his hands over his face, he mussed his hair and gave Hotch a forlorn expression, he scrubbed his hands down his face one more time, his gaze coming to rest on his hands, his focus on his wedding band, he'd only been married eight months._

_Donovan stood at the window to the bullpen that looked out from Hotch's, he spied Reid who looked up nervously at Hotch's office, Reid was his best friend..._

_There was a knock on the office door and Gideon entered, giving Donovan a sympathetic look and a hand to his shoulder,_

"_It'll be alright son; you'll be back before you know it"_

_So he left, he went home to an irate wife, who despite her anger understood that she had married a man who was really married to his service and to his country,_

_He would e-mail and call every day; he would visit if and when he could._

_He wasn't being deployed to serve a term in Afghanistan that much he knew_

_At the end of it all he wished he had.  
><em>

* * *

><p>"I met Sean and Clyde a few days later in Belgium, he gave me a file on Doyle and told me to commit it to memory and then he gave me a file full of female agents that they had in mind for their mission. "<p>

Donovan rubbed a hand over his head as he told his story,

"She was to have the most personal contact with Doyle, posing as an arms dealer and infiltrating his compound anyway she could nothing was off limits"

Emily sat back down in front of Donovan after giving him a beer,

"It had only been three months after Prague Sean had restricted me from duty until I cleared my psych evaluations and my physical how did I end up on that list?"

Donovan gave Emily a rueful smile

"You didn't,"

Emily looked at Donovan confused,

"There was no way Doyle was going to believe a woman who wanted to be in business with him was who she said she was if she had never seen the business end of a bullet or two"

Emily had to agree with that,

"Doyle himself had barely any hearing in his left ear, he had reconstructed his jaw twice, if he was ever going to see a woman as his equal, she would have had to have paid her dues thusly."

Donovan took a swig from his beer finishing half of it and continued,

"So I had Sean assemble a different file, a file of all the agents that were currently a little worse for wear but still manageable assets, and you came out on top"

* * *

><p>"<em>I don't like it Harry,"<em>

_Clyde and Sean called him Harry, because his middle name was Henry, they refused to call him Donovan,_

'_Too Irish' they'd say and laugh and walk away,_

_His wife called him Harry..._

_The three men were holed up in a shitty cottage on the outskirts of Belgium trying to tie up loose ends, they already had most of the players they needed, all they needed that one piece of the puzzle to round out their team._

_Donovan wanted Emily Prentiss, she did good work, she took on her covers like no one he had ever seen,_

_So she was a little bloody, it made her seem more real, he wasn't too keen on Clyde shutting down the idea, Donovan just hoped that Sean would have his back,_

_And Sean did have his back, so on a cold day in December of 2002 Sean McAllister reached out to Emily Prentiss requesting her return to the field, and she was happy to oblige._

_Donovan was tasked with making sure that Emily stayed alive and that she kept grounded,  
><em>

* * *

><p>Emily cocked her head to the right,<p>

"But I thought Clyde was running my surveillance"

Donovan took another healthy swig from his beer, and shook his head,

"Nope, he may have given you his little Boy Scout promise to keep you safe but since I had requested you I was responsible for you, Sean was okay with it, but I think it pissed off Clyde a bit though"

Emily smirked, it would.

"So, what happened? "

"We had you make contact with Doyle in Boston, and let the mission run its course. When we found out about the boy...we...I wanted to pull you out, I wanted to believe me Emily I did, Clyde said no and Sean was off dealing with the acquisition team"

Emily gave a thoughtful look; the weapons had to come from somewhere she supposed.

"He out ranked me so I had no choice, Clyde fucked up, he tried to use Doyle's feelings for you and his kid to gain more. He didn't realize the consequences"

* * *

><p>"<em>He has a son!"<em>

_Donovan ran his hands through his shaggy blonde hair clenching and unclenching his jaw,_

_He reared on Clyde throwing him against the nearest wall by his shirt and pinned him there,_

"_Get her outta there Clyde! She's not going to be thinking about herself anymore, she's going to be focused on that kid,"_

_Clyde struggled against the younger man for a moment, and yelled back,_

"_Don't you worry about that Harry; I'll tell you when it's time to pull her out"_

"_I thought that was what you paid me for Clyde...and as soon as she can she's going to start making decisions for that little boy! She's already done it for Christ's Sake!"_

_Clyde had wrestled Donovan off of him and caught him in the jaw with a right hook, _

"_You're gonna get her killed Clyde"_

_Donovan spat blood at the man's feet and stormed past him.  
><em>

* * *

><p>Emily sighed deeply, realization dawning on her,<p>

"Why did they wait so long after Northern Ireland?"

Northern Ireland had been a shit show. Emily had delivered and although it seemed as though things were running smoothly, and Doyle was playing into their web, he was no fool.

His right hand man Liam had a valid point; they should have pulled her out right then.

Doyle had Liam tail Lauren where ever she went, when she wasn't with him,

It started to make things harder; Donovan had wanted to start pulling her out, Clyde kept saying no.

"Doyle had Liam tailing you, he became your fucking shadow, do you remember, that time in the south of France? We were going to bring you in?"

Emily nodded,

"That was you?"

Donovan gave her a weary smile,

"Yeah, but Liam was too close, so I pulled out, closed up shop and waited for you to make contact, six months later we found out about Declan and I nearly shot Clyde when he told me to leave you in there. I'm sorry Emily"

Donovan reached over and took her hand into his larger one giving her fingers a light squeeze, after Emily or Lauren rather had denied Doyle's request to raise his son, and groom him, for his father's life style things had become strained between Emily and her mark.

Doyle was away more for work, and left Lauren Reynolds out of most if not all the goings on of his business, it was like he was fazing her out, or worse, he had found her out and was in the process of deciding her fate.

A week before he was taken into custody Doyle had received some rather alarming news; Lauren Reynolds was not really Lauren Reynolds after all...

* * *

><p>"<em>Ian, breathnu ar an" (Ian look at this)<em>

_Liam handed Doyle a photograph of Lauren Reynolds, who looked an awful lot like a federal agent named Emily Prentiss,_

"_Duirt me leat go raibh sir o-mhaith a bheth fior!" (I told you she was too good to be true)_

_Doyle took the service photo from Liam and tossed it into the lit fireplace, he would deal with Lauren...Emily...in his own time.  
><em>

* * *

><p>"Doyle knew, before he was taken into custody he knew...so we organized the raid, we didn't tell you just in case we could still pass you off as an arms dealer that had maybe turned or had been given immunity in exchange for your co-operation"<p>

Donovan finished his beer and gave Emily a sorrowful look,

"But he already knew who I was didn't he?"

Donovan nodded,

"He wasn't just about to kill you, he was too organized, too meticulous for that, he had to plan, he knew he was going away, so he had you tailed he had all of us tailed..."

Donovan looked down at his hands then,

"I left the day they brought you in, as far as I was concerned my job was done, we were never supposed to meet."

"Why didn't you go back to the BAU?"

"Sean had requested my permanent transfer to the unit, and I was able to work out of DC, my wife was understanding, but not that understanding, I got to profile and stay in the city."

He was leaving something out and she knew it...

"Donovan, tell me the whole truth,"

Donovan grinned, he hated profilers,

"Clyde and Sean when you left the unit, left Interpol, they pushed you into the BAU, to keep an eye on you, to keep you safe."

"But I thought Strauss had me assigned..."

Donovan shook his head and barked out a laugh,

"Strauss did no such thing, Clyde told the bureau everything they wanted to hear in your file, all the right words, and you had lobbied hard for the spot it kept you safe and kept you near Declan"

Emily was furious, these people had been making choices for her, deciding her life when she thought she was in total control, if she had wanted that for herself she would have stayed with Interpol.

Donovan saw the anger flash in her eyes, she gave him a weak smile, assuring him that she understood it wasn't his fault,

She hated Clyde in that moment...

"Tell me what happened when you went to North Korea?"

Donovan cleared his throat,

"Doyle wouldn't talk he refused food, water, torture everything, they could throw at him. Finally Sean called asked me to review the profile you submitted, he asked me what I thought"

"You requested the photos..."

Donovan nodded,

"The man was an egomaniacal sociopath with a son, a son he would do anything to protect, take that away he's got nothing."

Donovan started to chew his bottom lip at his next thought,

"He thought it was me, I showed up with the photos and he thought I was the one holding the gun"

Doyle would later learn that n was in fact Emily, who was in the picture...

"Donovan, where were you when Doyle escaped from North Korea?"

"Guantanamo..."

He had been on assignment his job had kept him alive.

He sighed and raked his hands through his unruly blond hair buried his face into his hands and started to cry.

JJ paced across her bedroom, one hand on her hip the other holding her cell phone to her ear.

"You have reached the almighty Garcia speak and be heard mortal"

"Garcia! It's JJ"

"Hey there kitten what's shakin'?"

"Emily's here"

"Ooh, really? Is she naked?"

"With Donovan"

The blonde was met with silence as Garcia registered and processed this information,

"Oh no..."

"Garcia, what does oh no mean?"

"She didn't try and kill him did she? Like our new piece of man candy is still alive right?"

JJ rolled her eyes,

"He's fine they are both fine, although Emily nearly choked him to death, why do I feel like you had something to do with this?"

Garcia sighed,

"Look Jayje I'm sorry, Emily just wanted to do some digging because frankly we're a bit worried about Mr. Sarcastic"

JJ sighed,

"And that's when you found out he was a part of the task force that took down Doyle"

"I know I shouldn't have looked but, well he's kind of grown on us you know?"

JJ stopped her pacing and sat down at the foot of her bed, and to think this morning her biggest problem had been trying to figure out what the hell was going on with her and Emily now that she was home...

She so wasn't expecting the shit to hit the fan...

JJ ran her hands through her hair, and rolled her neck, trying to release some of the tension that had built up over the morning.

She cast a fleeting glance out her bedroom door when she heard the front door open and close, her eyes widened when she heard the approach of footsteps up the stairs,

"Garcia I gotta call you back"

She hastily ended the call and tossed the phone on to her bed.

She wasn't sure what to do with herself as Emily came into view,

Emily knocked on the doorframe of her bedroom and gave her a smile,

"Thank you, for suggesting Donovan come over, I think he needed that more than I did"

JJ smiled and stood from her spot on the bed, as Emily walked into her room,

"You hungry I was thinking pizza and a movie?"

JJ nodded a beaming smile across her face,

"Yeah I could eat"

The women made their way downstairs, Emily ordered the pizza and JJ picked out the movie.

They settle on the couch waiting for their pizza, light conversation between them. A lull in their conversation appeared and then JJ fixed Emily with a look she couldn't quite place,

"Em, can I ask you an honest question?"

Emily smiled a warm smile,

"Of course"

JJ took a deep breath in and let it out, steadying her nerves...

She opened her mouth to speak and...

'DING DONG'

"Seriously!"

A/N: I couldn't help it, this chapter was so heavy I had to throw in a laugh..tell me what you think, you get to meet Cassandra in the next chapter, and maybe JJ will ask Emily her honest question, who knows...I have yet to write that part...


	6. Till Death Do Us Part

A/N: Readers meet Cassandra...

A/N: there's a bit'o T+ maybe 14 A going on in this chapter, just so you know...language and such...

* * *

><p>She Wasn't the Dinner Making Laundry doing Type...<p>

And that Suited Him just fine...

_Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation with the maximum of opportunity—George Bernard Shaw  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Donovan's feet pounded the pavement as he ran. Five kilometres everyday twice a day and he made sure never to run the same route more than twice. He may have been a six foot three bordering on one hundred and eighty pounds marine, but he also knew the statistic on routine and victims...<em>

_Thanks to Reid_

_Which is why when he arrived home from Utah that night with his new team he bade them a wonderful evening and went home to quickly change and head out for his run. He was off the next few days and he wanted to put the time to good use._

_He was halfway through, rounding a corner he decided to sprint the last kilometre, three years later he wasn't quite sure if it had been the smartest or dumbest thing he would ever do,_

_She nearly broke his nose._

_He didn't know what hit him; all he knew was that he was on the ground holding his bloodied face._

"_Awe Jesus what the fuck!"_

_His assailant landed a swift kick to his mid section and was about to keep running, when he announced who he was,_

"_Are you aware you just assaulted a federal agent?"_

_He stood to his full height now, pulling off his tank top to staunch the blood flow from his nose. The frown on his face disappeared immediately at the woman in front of him. She stood before him, long dark hair tied into a tight ponytail, rich dark eyes and caramel coloured skin, she was breath taking, and she was terrified._

_To her credit though she tried not to show it,_

"_Prove it"_

_She was in a fighting stance, ready to take him out if he was lying, he put his hands out palms towards her to show her he was not threatening, and slowly reached or his badge, and flipped it open._

_She leaned forward slightly to take a good look at the credential when she was satisfied she stepped back and folded her arms._

"_Behavioural Analysis Unit"_

_He nodded putting his wallet away. _

_She apologised eventually, and told him that if he didn't want to get punched in the nose he shouldn't sneak up on a girl. He smiled and told her that it was hardly sneaking if she heard him coming. She was a teacher, taught middle school, and was the furthest thing from what he had ever experienced growing up._

_He had dated women before, but none like her. Their courtship started off slow, they ran together for a few months, eventually, they started eating meals together whenever he was home, she gave him understanding and he knew he was lucky._

_He saw how much shit Hotch would catch from Haley...he was lucky and he knew it._

_Cassandra made him feel like he was worth it. She challenged him, made him a better man every day, and told him she loved him every day. The first six months were their hardest, his work took precedent over everything and on those tough cases when he would come home and she wouldn't hear from him in days, those scared her the most..._

'_knock knock'_

_Donovan trudged to his door, keeping the chain locked he opened it to reveal the angry dark eyes of his girlfriend,_

"_When did you get home?"_

_Oh she was pissed,_

"_Two days ago"_

_Her frown deepened, she was gonna get a head ache if she did that, he hated when she did that..._

"_Look I had a bad week okay...I kind of want to be alone..."_

_She shook her head and pushed on the door,_

"_So you can get trashed and blame yourself for whatever you couldn't stop in time, forget it Harry"_

_He was never allowed to cop out. So he had a shitty child hood, so did a lot of her students. So his job put him on the front line of some of the most horrific things that people could do to each other, she was always there to remind him that he did his job, so that maybe one day these things could be prevented..._

_So he let her in, he always let her in._

"_Hey, Cass why do you call me Harry?"_

_Cassandra smirked; he waits three years to ask me why I call him Harry? _

_Typical._

"_Because Donovan was your father's name, and you're not your father"_

_Cassandra had her head on his lap while he ran his fingers through her hair, his fingers stilled and she heard his breathing stop. She looked up at him and saw him smiling,_

"_Marry me"_

_And she did.  
><em>

* * *

><p>Donovan shot up in bed, scrubbing his hands over his face,<p>

"You need a haircut Harry"

He looked to his right sharply and was met with a casually dressed Cassandra. Black tank top dark blue jeans, boots his heart rate sped up, this wasn't real he was still dreaming, right?

He ran his hands through his hair absently she was right...he had meant to get it cut last week, but they had been called to a case in L.A. And he hadn't had the time. He cast a cautious glance to his right and breathed a sigh of relief when she was gone.

He was awake...

He grumbled as he got out of bed, grumbled on his way to the bathroom, grumbled as he called his barber. Cassandra would put her hands on her hips and playfully glare at him when he used to grumble, because he used to grumble at just about everything...

* * *

><p>"<em>Heads"<em>

_Cassandra flipped the coin, and it landed on tails,_

"_Sorry Harry, your turn to do laundry"_

"_I lost the last three laundry tosses! This thing has got to be broken"_

_He snatched the 'laundry' quarter from his wife and inspected it. _

"_The quarter came out of your pocket"_

_Donovan proceeded to grumble while he gathered the laundry from around the house, he grumbled while he separated the clothes and he grumbled while he loaded the washer. Cassandra came up behind him, hands wrapping firmly around his waist,_

"_Grumble all you want Harry, you lost fare and square"_

_He sighed and turned to take her in his arms,_

"_You know the only good thing about this situation?"_

_She shook her head as he kissed a trail along her jaw line and down her neck, _

"_I get to do you on the dryer"  
><em>

Donovan smiled at the memory, they found out they were pregnant that week.

* * *

><p>JJ grumbled as she went to pay the pizza boy, the poor kid stood shaking while she gave him a withering look. He scampered off and JJ went to put the pizza in the kitchen.<p>

She placed her hands on the counter and tried to steady her nerves with a deep cleansing breath, she hadn't seen Emily walk into the kitchen to stand beside her,

"Jayje, are you alright?"

JJ bit her bottom lip and looked off to the side for a second,

"Fuck it"

She announced tartly before marching the few steps towards Emily and grabbing the front of her shirt in her fists she pulled Emily forward pressing their lips together. Emily froze for a second before she placed her hands on JJ's hips and slid them to squeeze her ass and melted into the kiss.

Emily pulled JJ in further and moved them so that JJ was pinned between her and the kitchen table; she started to kiss along the blonde's neck with hot open mouthed kisses, stopping to bite at her pulse point. She felt the skin along JJ's neck pucker into goose bumps and a gasp left JJ's parted lips; she smirked against her skin and did it again.

JJ had buried her fingers in Emily's hair, and let her eyes drift closed as Emily continued to kiss and bite her way along her neck. Emily's hands went back to her hips and gave a slight push; JJ sat on the table and wrapped her legs around Emily's waist, wrapping her arms around the profiler's neck drawing her in deeper.

They pulled apart out of breath; Emily's hands had run up the back of JJ's t-shirt, JJ's fingers now fisted in her hair. Emily leaned her head forward and rested her forehead against JJ's a grin splitting across her face,

"Hi"

Emily said gasping for air; her voice was low and thick with want,

"Hi"

JJ whispered back, her own voice strained, her eyes had become a shade of blue Emily had never seen before, she was about to ask the obvious;

'Are you sure about this'

She decided against it when JJ reached for her and they started their little make out session all over again. Emily moved her hands to trail up the smooth skin off JJ's back pulling her t shirt up with her. JJ raised her arms and Emily pulled the top up and off tossing it behind her.

She let her lips travel over the newly exposed skin, loving the way JJ's nails were digging into her scalp as she dragged her tongue over a sensitive spot on her collar bone. She kissed her way down between her breasts and took a meandering path down her stomach to the button fly on her jeans.

There was a heaviness in the room, no words, just the sound of heavy gasping and the odd sharp gasp when Emily's lips or teeth or tongue came into contact with a particularly erogenous patch of skin on JJ's body.

And vice versa

Emily deftly undid the button fly on JJ's jeans and proceeded to pull them off, those too being tossed somewhere else in the kitchen. Emily reclaimed her place between JJ's thighs with the younger woman's legs wrapped tightly around her,

Emily was acutely aware of JJ moving her hips rhythmically against Emily trying to relieve some of the tension there. Emily pulled her lips away from the blonde's leaving them mere millimetres apart. JJ's eyes were heavily lidded her lips swollen from their kisses.

JJ's tongue shot out and licked Emily's lips, she gave her a naughty grin and placed a chaste kiss to the corner of her mouth,

"You're wearing too much" she whispered into the profiler's ear teeth tugging.

JJ slid her hands up the profiler's arms and settled them at the collar of Emily's shirt and started to undo each button one by one. The act was slow, and calculated, nothing like the way this had started. Emily's hands were placed firmly on JJ's hips stroking softly, her finger tips digging in every so often when JJ moved against her just so.

JJ leaned forward, and let her lips trace over the trail her fingers took as she undid each button stopping at the waist band of Emily's jeans. JJ gave the pale skin of Emily's neck a sharp nip with her teeth and slid the shirt from Emily's arms and let it fall to the ground.

JJ's eyes widened at what she could finally have. She placed reverent kisses along Emily's collar bone, and a gentle kiss to the scar of the four leaf clover that Doyle had given her. JJ slid her fingers up along Emily's arms and let her fingers trace nondescript patterns against the skin of her back as she pulled Emily in for another kiss.

The pair kissed frantically, hands and fingers trying to gain purchase on any surface they could find. Emily's fingers clenched almost painfully along JJ's hips, the fingers of JJ's left hand buried in Emily's hair, her right hand spread along her lower back, they could feel the heat radiating off of each other,

Emily tried to ignore the desperate moan from JJ's lips when she had moved against her intimately. This was insane.

"Bed now"

Emily stood, chest heaving jeans undone and hanging precariously off of slim hips. She had to move them, JJ was in nothing but her matching black bra and panties, and Emily was sure if she wasn't careful she was going to fuck her senseless on her kitchen table.

JJ's eyes came into focus on the woman currently driving her crazy with her teeth and tongue along her skin; she saw the desire and want reflected in dark eyes, so she decided to behave while Emily said what she had to say.

"We're not doing this on your kitchen table"

They had made it to JJ's bedroom, they weren't really concerned with the how, they were just grateful they had made it. Emily fit snugly between JJ's thighs as she moved over her on the bed and her lips continued their exploration grateful of the pair's newly acquired position.

JJ's bra had been pulled off with very little finesse on their way to her bedroom, Emily's too. Emily's lips had surrounded her right nipple and her tongue was busy teasing and licking the tip into a stiff peak.

"Fuck...Em"

JJ gripped at the bed sheets tightly as Emily repeated her efforts to JJ's left breast, her right hand snaking a trail down the blonde's stomach to tug at her panties.

Emily raised her head and searched JJ's eyes for any sign that said stop; she got none so off they came.

Despite her upbringing Emily had learned to treasure the simple things in life; a first snow fall during winter, the leaves changing colour in the fall. Those simple pleasures, that as you get older you forget to enjoy.

When she had met Jennifer Jareau all of those simple pleasures came flooding back, her synapses on over load. Jennifer Jareau with her gold spun hair and deep cobalt eyes were, to Emily Prentiss, Christmas morning and birthday presents all wrapped up into one.

Emily never thought that she would end up here, fuck on her bad days undercover she didn't think she would make it another six hours. But no, the day she sat across from Jennifer Jareau while she went on and on about protocol and procedure, she imagined kissing the blonde woman just to shut her up.

Six years later she really couldn't believe that this same woman had reached for her, pulled her into the deepest, sexiest kiss she had ever been pulled into and that, that kiss had lead them to this moment,

With two of Emily's fingers buried deep inside of JJ pumping slowly as JJ's hips moved in tandem to every thrust, her voice tight as she punctuated every movement of her hips with a breathy moan or a curse.

Later, when they were both too tired, to move from where they had collapsed in a heap of sweaty limbs and sore muscles, Emily placed a soft kiss to JJ's temple and asked,

"So, what was it you wanted to ask me?"

* * *

><p>Donovan ran his hands over his head, he felt like he was in the marine's again his hair was so short, because of his time in the marines where he had been required to have it regulation, when he could he kept the top and sides just past his ears with the back brushing his collar, Cassandra called it his lazy surfer hair.<p>

This time he had cut it very short and faded up the sides, he figured if he was going to be too busy to keep it neat, he might as well cut it short. He took in his reflection in the bathroom mirror and scratched at the neatly trimmed three days worth of hair on his face, and he wondered if Strauss was going to make him shave,

* * *

><p><em>Donovan was currently snuggled with his very pregnant wife in bed when she had run a hand along his cheek and scrunched her nose in displeasure, <em>

"_What's that face for?"_

"_You shaved"_

"_Strauss made me do it,"_

"_And it was perfect too"_

_Cassandra placed a chaste kiss to his lips and settled into bed,_

"_I'll start growing it back tomorrow"_

_He felt her smile as she rested her head against his chest; he had one arm behind his head and the other wrapped around her,_

"_How was the doctor's appointment?"_

"_Good, we are the proud parents of a healthy baby boy, who will be gracing us with his presence in three and a half months"_

_He looked down at her a broad smile across his face,_

"_We're having a boy?"_

_Cassandra nodded and accepted the kiss he offered,_

"_I was thinking we could name him Ioan (Yo-an) Henry"_

_Donovan smiled and nodded, he was up before Cassandra the next morning, and was showered and doing up his tie when she had come out of the shower, he was flying to Guantanamo and that was all Cassandra was allowed to know._

"_Look at you, I don't remember the last time I saw you wear a suit jacket."_

_She had come up to smooth her hands over his shirt on his chest, he cocked an eyebrow and gave her a kiss, Cassandra straightened out his tie and he kissed her again._

"_Dinner at your parents last week, okay love, I have to go, I love you be safe, I will call you if I can,"_

_He caressed her round belly lovingly and gave her stomach a small kiss before saying,_

"_And you Mr. Ioan Henry Gainnes, take care of your mother"_

_Standing to his full height he gave her a cheeky smile and another kiss, Cassandra had handed him his go bag and started pushing him towards the front door of their house,_

"_Harry, get going or you're going to miss your flight!"_

He wished he had

Years later he obsessed over the little things, what if he had said no to Guantanamo, what if he had stayed an extra half hour to eat breakfast with her. Donovan would later learn that it would not have mattered,

_Donovan was tired and angry and he missed his pregnant wife. He had the sleeves of his officer uniform rolled up to the elbow, the words "virtue" and "respect" tattooed on his forearms, _

_He stood with his hands at his back 'at ease' his jaw clenched,_

"_Permission to speak freely sir"_

"_Granted"_

"_Remanded into custody sir, sounds like I'm being detained sir"_

_He stood across from his CO while in Guantanamo, BAU or not he was still a marine. The older man looked across at Donovan, he was good at his job and a damn good marine, and he should at least be given the respect of the truth..._

_So his CO told him the truth that his wife had been murdered, and it looked professional, tactical. He had been remanded into custody for his safety._

_Donovan had stood, unmoving for some time, he had registered the words, he clenched his jaw harder and still he did not move. He took quick shallow breaths in and out until finally he spoke,_

"_Murdered sir"_

"_I'm sorry son"_

_They hadn't let him go home; they weren't going to let him go home until they had caught who had murdered his wife. Donovan had made a few calls, and came up empty, until Clyde had called him, his wife and unborn child had been dead a whole week before that bastard had called him,_

"_Harry, I'm so sorry"_

"_Don't you tell me you're sorry you son of a bitch, how the fuck did this happen!"_

"_Politics Harry, Doyle was being transferred, he escaped during the handoff"_

"_And you're telling me now! My wife is dead Clyde, she was nearly seven months pregnant did you know that?"_

_No, he hadn't. _

"_Harry listen to me, I can't find Sean, last I spoke with him he said he had spoken to Emily and that he was trying to make contact with Tsia"_

_They made arrangements for Donovan to fly to Europe, Doyle was working his way through the team, and now that he was stateside, it was obvious who he was saving for last. So, Donovan flew to Europe, Clyde met him on the air strip,_

_They arrived at a small cabin in the middle of nowhere Donovan looked around for Sean; the look on Clyde's face told him all he needed to know. Donovan looked around and took in his surroundings, and then he took a hard swing at Clyde knocking him to the ground and onto his back as he started to yell,_

"_I should kill you, you piece of shit, you're a fucking coward you know that?"_

_He proceeded to beat Clyde silly, _

_Clyde was splayed on his back, hands up in defeat, Donovan grabbed the front of his shirt and pressed the barrel of his gun into Clyde's forehead,_

"_You wanna kill me Harry then fine, but that's not going to solve anything, the only way to stop this, to get Doyle, is to save Emily"_

_Donovan uncocked his gun and put it back into the holster he kept in his side._

_The bastard was right._

_So they started at the beginning, where they found out that Jeremy had sold the list to one of Doyle's men for cash and immunity..._

_Donovan had found Jeremy in France, he jogged every day, same route same time, stopped at the same cafe for a coffee on the way home. _

"_I know you want to hurt him all sorts of ways Harry but this needs to look like an accident"_

_They had counted on Emily making contact with Tsia after hearing about Doyle, and Jeremy's subsequent death would make Tsia question her safety and that she would end up in the states._

_Donovan did as he was told, and Tsia had played into their web, Clyde made contact with Tsia state side while Donovan kept an eye on Emily. The first time Doyle made contact with Emily, it had been harmless really, taunting phone call a text message here and there. _

_Donovan had wanted to pull her in until he remembered that this was about getting Doyle just as much as it was about protecting Emily. And then the whole thing exploded. He had been tailing Emily for weeks and was exhausted,_

_Donovan was sat in an armchair arms folded head lolled to the side as he took in a few minutes rest, _

"_Harry, wake up, Emily's gone, she's in the wind"_

_He bolted out of his chair and whipped around to look at Clyde,_

"_She was supposed to stay with her team Clyde, that was the only way we could keep her safe."_

"_Well, Harry you know what she's like, she was never one to listen to authority, kind of reminds me of a bloke I know"_

_Donovan gave him the finger and scrolled through his phone until he found what he was looking for,_

"_She's going to Boston"_

_And from there, everything just seemed to move so bloody fast to him. An agent was being called into the BAU, she had to be read in, Donovan had followed Emily to Boston, but he had been too late... Clyde got detained._

_Doyle had evaded capture, _

_Emily might not make it..._

_Emily was in surgery he watched from the viewing box of the operating room as the surgeons worked on her. He would glance every so often at the petite blonde who stood, her back ram rod straight tears flowing freely down her cheeks as she played with the pendant on her necklace, quietly praying._

_He smirked and wondered if the blonde woman knew she was in love with Emily. He left her to her own devices to get some sleep. Emily would be relocated to Europe once she was fully recovered and Donovan would be tasked with her safety once more._

_He had pulled some strings with the Department of Defence, and when an agent was to be tasked with giving Emily her papers, he made sure it had been the blonde woman he had seen at the hospital, he later learned that it had been JJ, funny it never occurred to him that he would eventually be working with her,_

_Eight months later he was on the phone with Clyde, a litany of colourful expletives leaving his mouth,_

"_That fucking woman I'm gonna fucking kill 'er myself!"_

_Emily had received a call and was on her way back to the states she had been given explicit instructions to contact her handler if she were going to leave the country, apparently she wasn't the following orders type..._

"_Listen it's not the end of the world, the FBI has Doyle in custody and it seems like they caught him unawares so he won't try and escape"_

Clyde was right Doyle hadn't escaped; he had met the wrong end of a bullet to the throat and died on the scene. Donovan had taken a long vacation after the Doyle/Emily fiasco and upon his return had been reinstated to the BAU.

Which brought him to this moment in time; he was sitting in the middle of his living room bottle of bourbon in one hand, his dog tags with his wife's wedding band on them in the other, he took a long pull from his bottle of bourbon and smiled a slight smile, and wondered if she was proud of him.

* * *

><p>She could get used to this, that was the first thing Emily thought when she awoke the next morning with JJ's head nestled into the crook of her neck, her soft breaths floating over her skin. Emily kissed JJ's forehead, and couldn't help but smile at the way the blonde scrunched up her nose at the gentle nudge Emily gave her to wake her up,<p>

"If you think you're getting out of this bed then you're insane"

JJ had tightened her grip on the brunette and had wrapped her legs around her, trying to keep her in the bed,

"Jennifer," Emily said sweetly,

"Yes?"

"I have to pee"

With a huff JJ untangled herself from Emily and appreciated the outstanding view she got of the profiler's naked ass as she sashayed into the en suite bathroom,

Yeah, Emily thought as she settled back into bed with JJ resting an arm across her stomach could definitely get used to this.

* * *

><p>AN: Hello there, my apologies for the late update, back in school and trying to make decisions about my culinary future and so on... I hope you kept your arms and legs outside of the vehicle at all times and that you intend to keep my world going round with a comment/review thanx...


	7. The Adversary

A/N: Hey there all, Chapter VII here, sorry it's so friggin late, I had to decide my culinary educational future, so...Chef's House it is! Google it...selfless plug for myself and my school that. So on with the good stuff, I hope y'all are hanging on strong, and I thank you for all the support, I wouldn't be writing without you, so once again thank you.

* * *

><p>Lately he's been running in circles...<p>

"It had been my philosophy of life that, difficulties vanish when faced boldly"

Isaac Asimov

* * *

><p>JJ sat at her desk, heels off, running the top of her foot along her calf. She chewed on the end of her pencil thoughtfully as she filled out her report. She sighed deeply, and knitted her eyebrows in frustration,<p>

She must have read and re-read the same sentence at least four times,

"Careful blondie, frown any deeper and I'll start calling you McGruff"

JJ looked up from her report and glared daggers at Donovan, who consequently sat leaned back in his chair feet up on his desk fingers interlaced behind his head. It never ceased to amaze her how he and Spencer always managed to finish their reports light years ahead of the rest of the team.

Morgan came up behind the young man and smacked him in the back of the head,

"Feet off my desk kid"

Donovan sat up right and rubbed the back of his head, as Derek perched at the edge of his desk offering JJ a wide smile,

Finally she put the finishing touches on her report, closed the beige folder and dropped it onto her 'finished' pile.

"Finally!"

Donovan barked, JJ gave him a snarky look and slipped her shoes on as she stood up slipping her arms into her tan coat as Derek held it open for her. She looked around the bullpen and smiled when Garcia came scurrying in amidst a rainbow of colours and flair,

"Are we ready to go my fine furry crime fighting friends?"

"We're just waiting for Prentiss"

Donovan glanced over at JJ whose cheeks had tinted a slight rose,

'Yeah, definitely got it bad' he thought and smirked his own little smirk as he shrugged on his leather jacket.

As if on cue Emily came storming into the bullpen and straight into Hotch's office, he knew that walk, that was a mission walk...

Hotch took a double take as Emily burst into his office; he gave a deep sigh and couldn't help how familiar the situation seemed to him.

"Does anybody, anybody at all not care about what I think or want?"

"Emily, close the door and sit down"

"I think I'll stand"

"Suit yourself,"

Hotch squared his shoulders at the agent before him. He had come to call this woman family over the last six years. And he braced himself for the onslaught he was about to receive. He had seen his family go through more than any one family should, and he wasn't sure how much more they were going to be able to take.

He wished the brass would give them one year, one solid year of peace and quiet, or the closest thing to peace and quiet that the BAU could attain, he was sick and tired of his team his family getting tossed around like reusable assets, they were people too for crying out loud.

"I'm not going, end of story"

"You think the brass is going to give you a choice, did they give Donovan a choice? JJ?"

Emily pursed her lips and just about growled at him, she wasn't going back, she'd rather go to prison

"From what I hear, it isn't permanent; you would be on loan for at most a year"

Emily rolled her eyes, she knew how they worked, first you're on loan, then you're put on a list, she wasn't going back on that list.

"I'm not going, Aaron"

With that she left his office, and returned to her desk and slipped on her coat like nothing had happened, she had fixed her team with a look that begged them not to pry, and out of respect they didn't. As they stood waiting for the elevators to leave a clearing of someone's throat stopped them.

"Agent Gainnes, I need to speak with you please, now"

Donovan sighed, he wasn't really in the mood,

"Really, Strauss, I'm not really in the mood for you how about tomorrow morning?"

She raised her eyebrows in that way only she could and Donovan's shoulders sagged,

"And maybe we can talk about wearing office appropriate attire as well"

And with that she turned and walked away, Donovan looked down at what he was wearing, he had on light straight leg denim jeans and his combat boots were loosely tied, his shirt was un-tucked and haphazardly buttoned...

"What's wrong with what I'm wearing?"

* * *

><p>AN: Short one for now guys, I'm just getting back into this story again, and I'm STILL trying to figure out my culinary future...so Happy Holidays for now and I'll see y'all real, real soon...


End file.
